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Hayami Saori - Shiroi Kokoro

posted
Total Posts
62
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
This beatmap was submitted using in-game submission on Thursday, February 24, 2011 at 1:26:55 PM

Artist: Hayami Saori
Title: Shiroi Kokoro (TV Size)
Source: Ore no Imouto ga Konna ni Kawaii Wake ga nai
Tags: Oreimo senaya ending
BPM: 132
Filesize: 3961kb
Play Time: 01:26
Difficulties Available:
  1. Hard (4.49 stars, 156 notes)
  2. Insane (4.89 stars, 242 notes)
  3. Normal (2.68 stars, 120 notes)
  4. senaya's Hard (4.76 stars, 195 notes)
Download: Hayami Saori - Shiroi Kokoro (TV Size)
Information: Scores/Beatmap Listing
---------------
One of the many ending songs of Oreimo (Ore no Imouto ga Konna ni Kawaii ga Nai). Don't mind the not-very-exciting storyboard. I just wanted to see how storyboarding works. Enjoy.

Jan 12 - improved background image. Added Senaya's Hard
Feb 24 - redownload if downloaded before this date

Thanks for all the mods!
Last edited by winber1 , edited 34 times in total.
jericho2442
osu! Alumni
1,918 posts
Joined March 2009
jericho2442
ok first off you NEED a dfficulty under 3 stars for rank, so please make a easy

you are using red timing sections for different slider speeds, this is unrankable, please fix this by either removing the slider speeds or using the green timing sections and then changing the bpm multiplier

also the speed changing on the Normal diff really does not fit, please think about using one speed for the normal diff

please fix these issue's before i mod this ;)
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Oh, sorry about that. I fixed it the errors. I just wanted a certain speed which I couldn't get from the bpm multiplier, or at least i didn't know how... cuz i can't get it lower than .5x speed. Anyhow, i got rid of the red timing sections and just made the sliders a little longer.
gdeath
1,598 posts
Joined May 2009
gdeath
-General-
I ever saw some maps using bpm change to slow down the speed of sliders without any argument.
I think its allowable to set timing section like that if you're just trying to make the map more fun.

[Easy]
00:33:182 (1,2,3,4,5) - This is a great pattern.And i know you're trying to stack different ones in order to make the map more fun.
But its a bit hard for newplayers to control the rhythm according to the minor spacing.
If this appears on Hard/Insane, i'll definiately clap my hands in applause.So pls consider to change it?
00:36:818 (1,2,3,4,5) - ^
01:24:773 (1,2) - It wouldl be easier to play if you could move both of two circles up a little in order to keep the same spacing as the previous one.Coz i'm still thinking about the spacing sudden changed which will confuse the newplayers.
01:25:909 (1) - I'd make it silence competely.

[Hard]
00:54:091 (1) - Remove new combo?Coz i feel a bit weird.
01:06:364 (1) - I'd move it far away from 01:05:000 (6) in order to keep the spacing look better.Or i suggest you can add some notes between them if might?
01:25:908 (1) - Its unrankable that the spinner competely cover the end of slider.
01:25:909 (1) - I'd make it silence competely.

[Insane]
01:25:909 (1) - The same issue as "Hard' for the last pattern.
01:25:909 (1) - I'd make it silence competely.


Overall, that's quite a good effort.^^

/me shoots star.
Sandpig
847 posts
Joined September 2010
Sandpig
hi :D

(>'(oo)')> my mod <('(oo)'<)


remove the first timing setting. I think you don't need it


Insane

00:27:297 (8) - I don't like this part. it seems that the rhythm is forced stopped. try adding some notes before 00:28:660 (1) (no lyric doesn't mean no rhythm)
00:52:297 (1) - personally I don't recommand this kind of 1/8 slider...because it is hard to recognize that they are 1/8 slider before hitting.
00:53:206 (5) - ^


Hard

00:15:909 (1,2) - make them farther apart?
00:27:273 (7,1) - same problem as that in Insane
00:52:273 (1,2) - turn down the volume

and I think the change of the slider speed is too frequent. actually 0.5x slider doesn't work well with 1.0x slider. if you want to slow down, try using 0.65x or 0.75x

00:17:282 (1) - this 0.5x slider plays not good. it seems that there should be more notes here (for instance on 00:17:727)
00:54:545 (1) - I'd prefer if you change it into a 1.0x slider. the rhythm here [00:54:545 (1,2,3)] is hard to catch with this slowing down
01:10:457 (1,2,3) - ^ for the same reason because of the same rhythm
01:12:273 (4) - try using more notes instead of 0.5x slider
01:14:091 (1) - ^


senaya's Hard

00:52:043 (4) - change it into a spinner?


Easy

the slider velocity seems little fast in this diff

00:06:818 (2,3,4) - the arrangement here looks unfriendly to beginners
00:17:273 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4) - use some pattern instead of stacking?
01:02:727 (2,3,4) - it's too hard in a Easy...

I hope you can treat this diff more thoughtfully



star
senaya
osu! Alumni
5,798 posts
Joined March 2010
senaya

Sandpig wrote:

senaya's Hard

00:52:043 (4) - change it into a spinner?
I think that it has enough spinners. But I've replaced that slow slider and removed the x0.50 time section.
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
k thanks, i took all the suggestions.
Colin Hou
osu! Alumni
4,456 posts
Joined November 2009
Colin Hou
[General]:
  1. you need to add (TV Size) to the title
  2. enable the 'Display epilepsy warning' in Song Setup-> StoryBoarding
  3. set preview point at the same place in all diffs
  4. White.jpg resize this to 640x480 plz, as an single color image, that's totally enough.
  5. add senaya to all diffs' tags
[senaya's Hard]:
  1. kinda of overuse of spinner. but fine
  2. 01:25:302 (1) - extend this to the same ending point
[Easy]:
  1. easy enough for easist diff, but OD+2 and rename it to normal may work better, too low OD makes it confusing when there are too many notes on the screen.
that's all, great job
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Umm... do i have to add "TV Size", or is there a way to add without having to upload a whole new map? I don't really want to start over with the map... all other suggestions were applied to the map. thanks.
Colin Hou
osu! Alumni
4,456 posts
Joined November 2009
Colin Hou

winber1 wrote:

Umm... do i have to add "TV Size", or is there a way to add without having to upload a whole new map? I don't really want to start over with the map... all other suggestions were applied to the map. thanks.
you do not need to start a new one, read the following thread:
viewtopic.php?f=56&t=24443
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
I'm confused about the web menu not grayed out part... Does it just mean the "Web" on the top of the window
(that has these tabs:"File Edit View Compose Design Timing Web Help") should not be greyed out? That has never been greyed out.. ever... for me... so I was just wondering.
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Ok, nvm. I'm just being paranoid about it. I always want to be sure what I'm doing, cuz I didn't want to screw anything up, but it worked so thanks for the info.
narakucrimson
osu! Alumni
1,713 posts
Joined March 2010
narakucrimson
Hi!

Here it goes!

[General]

I don't like the fact that you have 3 difficulties rated as insane. I mean, 3!!!

But anyway, it's ok, just saying...


[Easy]

33:370 (1) - I don't like the spacing you used for these 2 combos. I mean, it's an easy difficulty after all, a noob player might not be able to follow a x0,5 speed out of nowhere. So, spread them up a little.
1:10:530 (1) - And again, x0,5 on an Easy? No way.
1:25:302 (SP) - Start the spinner here, and silence the end totally.

Looks nice :) I don't usually like easy diffs but this looks just fine :]


[senaya's Hard]

57:689 (3) - 1 grid up and 1 grid right.
1:01:211 (4,5) - 2 grids down, to make a more precise pentagon pattern.
1:28:257 (SP) - Again, silence the end totally.


[Hard]

7:802 (4) - The end of the slider is hidden by the score of the previous note, so you can't see if there's a repetition.Even if it's obvious that there isn't one, I'd suggest to move this slider.
48:257 (2) - 2 grids left, trust me.
50:984 (4,5,6) - Accelerated spacing wtf? xD There's no reason for an accelerated spacing here...
1:13:257 (5) - New combo here?


[Insane]

Love this one! Pity that I can't play it with my new mouse D:


Nice work! Havea star :3
Tenshi-nyan
1,482 posts
Joined September 2010
Tenshi-nyan
General
You have 2 .osb files - one MUST be deleted.

Insane
00:10:075 (1) - 3 grids left ?

very nice map~

Hard
01:10:529 (5) - 2 grids left ?
01:18:029 (2) - ^ ?

senaya
00:15:530 (6) - start at 00:15:984 , end at 00:17:120 , and add a circle at 00:15:530
00:26:439 (7) - start at 00:26:666 , add circle at 00:26:439
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Thanks for the mod Tenshi-nyan and narakucrimson.

I added the changes except..

narakucrimson wrote:

50:984 (4,5,6) - Accelerated spacing wtf? xD There's no reason for an accelerated spacing here...
I just wanted to it match the insane, and it's about to reach the climax of the song. So I thought it fits, and I didn't change it (sorry :().

Tenshi-nyan wrote:

00:10:075 (1) - 3 grids left ?
I didn't really want it on top of the other note, so instead of moving to the left, I moved to the right so it's more visible. idk if that's ok with you.
nimi
978 posts
Joined April 2010
nimi
Ohai :) Modding as requested

General
The map in general should have more hitsounds, but well, this is not reeally a huge problem.

Easy
00:24:620 (5) - new combo
00:47:575 (3) - i'd change a little the shape of the slider, making the curve here a little more uhh.. curved? XD like this http://puu.sh/JMI
01:03:257 (3) - why blue tick here? D: it sounds bad >_< make it like this http://puu.sh/JMK
01:15:984 (1) - add 2 more repeats on this slider

Hard
00:33:257 (1,2,3,4,5) - bad spacing imo, it makes really hard to read the combo
00:36:893 (1,2,3,4,5) - ^
00:47:575 (1) - remove new combo?
01:18:711 (4) - make this curve like the one in (3). For that, you could select (3), ctrl+c ctr+ v and than flip it horizontally (Ctrl+J)

senaya's Hard
The kiai time should be the same of other diffs, please check this.

Insane
00:12:120 (6) - uhh this slider sounds a little off. I'd change it making it like this http://puu.sh/JMU
00:22:120 (5) - new combo
00:33:257 (1,2,3,4,5) - the same of hard about this spacing D:
00:36:893 (1,2,3,4,5) - ^
00:57:802 (5,6) - wuut this jump is a little random imo

That's all. Cute song and bg x3 Star'd
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Thanks for modding, but..

Wiinter wrote:

Hard
00:33:257 (1,2,3,4,5) - bad spacing imo, it makes really hard to read the combo
00:36:893 (1,2,3,4,5) - ^

Insane
00:33:257 (1,2,3,4,5) - the same of hard about this spacing D:
00:36:893 (1,2,3,4,5) - ^
Really? I thought it was good :(. well, someone in an earlier mod liked it. Hope you don't mind if I don't change it?

all other suggestions were added. thanks :D
TTTTTTTTTTTT
1,116 posts
Joined August 2009
TTTTTTTTTTTT
Easy

kiai start at 00:55:984, kiai finish at 01:10:530

HP Drain Rate +1 or +2

01:09:166(1) - remove clap and add a finish hitsound
01:10:530(1) - move 1 grid left and 1 grid up(lv3)

Hard

kiai start at 00:55:984, kiai finish at 01:10:530

01:10:416 - the inheriting section is useless
01:10:757 - the inheriting section is useless
01:10:984 - the inheriting section is useless

00:09:620(5) - move 1 grid up(lv3)
00:50:984(4) - move 1 grid right(lv3)
00:51:439(5) - ^

senaya's Hard

00:18:939(6) - remove clap and add clap at 00:18:257(2)
00:20:575(6) - remove clap and add clap at 00:20:075(2)
00:50:530(6) - make symmetric

Insane

kiai start at 00:55:984, kiai finish at 01:10:530

star
Gonzvlo
osu! Alumni
2,896 posts
Joined January 2010
Gonzvlo
General
  1. I highly suggest to map a Normal diff, If you don't want to map it remember that you can ask for guest diffs.
Easy
  1. 00:50:302 (1) - Definitely "No" for Easy, Change this for a 1/1 slider or something. (But no...)
  2. 00:52:348 (1,2) - ^ , Both of them.
  3. 01:07:120 (2) - I can't believe you did it again >w< . ( Try to keep notes on 1/1 and some 1/2 for easy.
  4. 01:15:984 (1) - ^
  5. 01:24:166 (5) - ^
  6. 01:24:848 (1,2) - Why don't you turn this into a single slider to make things more simple.
Hard
  1. 00:08:484 (1,2,3,4,5) - This will be easier to read if you stack (5) with the end of (2)
  2. 00:25:075 (1,2,3,4,5,6,7) - I suggest to use an Horizontal flip (Ctrl + H) for this whole pattern because it looks messy if you place it right where the last pattern was placed too.
  3. 00:30:075 (1) - Random New Combo, remove it~
  4. 00:30:984 (1,2,3,4,1,2,3) - Look at this as you can see, it looks messy and it's hard to read, try this instead
  5. 00:55:984 (4,1,2) - Keep spacing consistent (Fix spacing between (1) and (2))
  6. 01:26:211 (1) - Make this spinner end here: 01:28:257 - to keep consistency with Easy.
senaya's Hard
  1. 00:33:257 (2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9) - Don't reduce volume completely , reduce it by 3 or 4 ticks.
Insane
  1. 00:17:348 (1) - This 0.5 is kinda unexpected , try 0.75 or remove it completely.
  2. 00:54:620 (1) - ^
  3. 01:10:529 (1) - ^
  4. 01:14:166 (1) - ^
  5. 01:26:211 (1) - Make it end here: 01:28:257 - to keep consistency with the other diffs.
  6. I don't like some of those spacing changes in this diffs, consider reducing some of them or keep spacing completely regular.
Nice job for one of your first beatmaps , Try to get more mods and this will look quite nice.
winber1
4,520 posts
Joined February 2010
Topic Starter
winber1
Thanks for modding.
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